Zesty Arugula Salad

Enough arugula or watercress for two
Handful of pine nuts
A few sundried tomatoes
¼ pound grassfed cheddar cheese
¼ cup sesame oil
juice of 1 orange
pinch of ground white pepper

Baked Pears with Nutmeg and Almonds
2-4 pears (bosc, bartlett, or my favorite, Asian)
2 cloves
1 cinnamon stick
1 nutmeg
½ cup sliced almonds
1 vanilla bean


Whenever I’m playing Mommy, I always like to start by putting on my apron. Sometimes I may be wearing fabulous stockings and lingerie underneath a classic crinoline or I may simply place the apron over one of my classic black jersey dresses. In either case, the apron encapsulates the scene and gets me ready for domestic duty and potentially raunchy sex.

Method:

Peel the pears leaving the stems on and place them in a small baking dish with about a ¼ inch of water at the bottom of the pan. Add cinnamon stick, cloves, and chopped vanilla bean to the water. Grate nutmeg liberally over the pears. Place the pears in a pre-heated over at 350 and bake for approximately one hour.

Next, rub the steak with the truffle salt and pepper on both sides. Set to the side or refrigerate.

Call out to your little one, for example, “Junior, it’s almost time for dinner! Come to Mommy!” Your little one should then present his or her hands to see if they’re clean, and of course they won’t be clean enough for Mommy. So, now is a good time to take your little one and place him or her across your lap for a nice lengthy spanking. If he or she is a masochist once warmed up properly, a good sound paddling should be administered on the bare bottom. And then, march the little one off to the bathroom and wash his or hands with warm soapy water making sure to get under the fingernails nice and closely. Gently caress your little ones head and tell them how important it is that they get disciplined by Mommy so that they can grow up to be big and strong and smart. Then hug the little one, letting him or her nuzzling into your chest, perhaps even suckling, while you caress his or her crotch area for additional stimulation. Return to the kitchen where the pear should now be ready to be taken from the oven. Place the little one at the table with a cold drink, ideally milk, but in some cases an adult beverage in a baby bottle will do, and allow the little one to soak in your Momminess as you move about the kitchen with grace and fortitude. Once the little one is sitting down walk slowly to the oven and bend over carefully to pull the baked pears out of the oven. Take ladle and pour juice over the top of the pears.

Slice the sundried tomatoes into small slivers while toasting the pine nuts in a small saute pan with nothing else in it. Take the sesame oil and the juice of the orange and wisk it together in the bottom of a medium to large size bowl until it emulsifies. Then add white pepper.

Put the truffle oil in a large fry pan on medium to high heat. Add chopped garlic. Place the steak in the middle of the fry pan with the mushrooms on either side of the steak and begin cooking.

Toss the arugula with the sundried tomatoes and pine nuts in the dressing. Slice the cheese into very thin slivers, placing it on top of the salad. Give a slice of cheese to your little and watch him or her smile gleefully. Pat little one on the head.

Flip the steak and toast the slivered almonds. Once almonds are toasted ladle the juices over the pears once more and sprinkle the freshly roasted almonds over them. Sit at the table with your little one, slicing his or her steak and feeding ensuring that all vegetables and meat are eaten before allowing your little one that special dessert. You might take a moment to crawl into bed for a bit of story time before eating your dessert. Whatever the case may be I hope that story time is dirty, sexy, and your special little secret.